email: T. Johnson <email@example.com>
subject: Dateline 1980: Tina Chopp and the FFF
body: My name is Tim and this is my story.
I attended Western Washington University during 1980-1981. I was first exposed to the message "Tina Chopp is God" when I saw the phrase scrawled in chalk on the sidewalk in front of Old Main in the fall of 1980.
I had another encounter with the truth when a couple of friends and I discovered another Tina Chopp message written on the inner walls of a sculpture nicknamed Rust Never Sleeps, (shortly thereafter, we learned that it was actually Wrights Triangle by Richard Serra).
One might think that these crude, dusty scribbles would be considered a discourteous or inadequate method of communication. (In hindsight, I see the simple genius of Tina Chopps disciples in utilizing any and every available means to spread her message of Truth).
After this first revelation, my curiosity was aroused, and I purposely sought out signs, sightings, information, anything, any clue which would verify the existence of Tina Chopp.
My investigations were aided by the fact thatas part of my work-study job dutiesI had access to certain administrative offices and other private areas of the University. I will not go into detail here, but at the time, the office for which I worked was located in a building on the WWU campus close to Birnham Wood (I do not know if it has since been relocated).
After hours of exploration and examination during my rounds of the campus, I was eventually able to piece together a labyrinth of coded messages, clues which were routinely missed by those who chose not to see. These messages and testimonies provided gently seductive yet compelling and ultimately incontrovertible proof of the existence and deity of Tina Chopp.
Due to the fact that the uninitiated may misunderstand the implications of these discovered Truths, I am not at liberty to disclose them in this open forum. I can reveal, however, that many of the scripts were posted with an imprimatur underneath which read, This Message Brought to You Courtesy of the Flaming Freshman Fellowship. Each of these signatures was accompanied by a drawing of the Flaming Freshman Fellowship (FFF) mascot. The mascot is a stick-figure vaguely reminiscent of the Killroy Was Here propaganda character popularized during the Second World War (Google search: http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=killroy+was+here)
Was this FFF a group of Tina Chopp disciples? Was it a splinter group? Was it a disinformation team attempting to destroy the credibility of Tina Chopp and her followers? These were among the many mysteries that I attempted to unravel
Unfortunately, my dedication to school increased, and my ardor in searching for Tina cooled. Eventually, I moved to another area to attend college. Due mainly to the geographic distance, I eventually lost touch with the sub-Bellingham vibration which is the Spirit of Tina Chopp. Occasionally over the years, however, I would still muse on the strange but brief influence that this exotic God had had on my life.
I was to receive a shock a number of years later, however, when I was attending school at the University of Idaho in Moscow, Idaho.
On one particular, but otherwise nondescript evening, a group of friends and I were frequenting a drinking establishmentas we were frequently known to do. For the purpose of this report, I will call it Jacks Alley. My friend, whom we will call Rose, begged me to accompany her into the Ladies roomto stand guard as it were. (Jacks Alley is not know for its subtlety or refinement).
Upon entering the Ladies Room, I was stunned by the breadth and depth of the graffiti on the walls. It was certainly different than the scratchings that I had seen during my regular trips to the Mens roomit was also much more clever and certainly more subversive
As my eyes climbed the wall to follow a certain doodle, I slowly became aware of a specific name, mixed in with the overlapping and jammed-together missives: T. Chopp.
I was stunned. In small red letters was clearly written the name of the entity with whom I had lost contact so many years before. And immediately underneath, in large black block letters was written, SATAN IN YOUR BAR NOW! I immediately became very disturbed and fled the Ladies Room. I completely abandoned Rose to minister to her own bodily functions alone; for that, I am sorry.
In a single moment, I had been presented with both an epiphany and a warning. I had rediscovered my dedication to Tina Chopp, but I was also blatantly reminded that one cannot begin to try to circumscribe the means or manners of either Tina Chopps disciples nor of her detractors.
I am more sure now than ever, however, that the very power of Tina Chopp is sufficient to overcome the cheap ministrations and limitations of the human mind.
Simply believe: Tina Chopp is God.
I verify that the foregoing account of events is true to the best of my knowledge, and I would be happy to answer any questions the reader may have (Excepting, of course, those questions which relate directly to the arcane knowledge which has heretofore been secretly imparted to myself). Please feel free to email me.
To which we responded
you have caused the entire Church to indulge in reminiscences about the early days, when Osiris Ranebo was still alive, and everything was right with the world... except for the fact that those were also the days of the great anti-Tinite Reagan and his minions... but anyway...
The sculpture that you mentioned, which in reality is called "Wright's Triangle" by Richard Serra, was intended by the artist to be a "grafitti catcher", and there was some disagreements with the artist, himself, over this when the grafitti you mentioned was still fresh. it got to the point where Richard Serra said that if they were going to sandblast the sculpture, or treat it so that grafitti couldn't be written on it, that they could take his name off. i don't know whether they ever actually did or not, but i do know that they coated the sculpture in plastic so that chalk and spray paint can be cleaned off more easily.
we all remember seeing the grafitti by the flaming freshman fellowship, but we don't know who was behind it, as it was rather a "birnham wood" type of thing, and we were all from buchannan towers. also, there were a number of "copycat" grafitti incidents after the infamous Grafitti Incident® with which the world first came to know about Tina Chopp, and i, personally, remember thinking that it was one of those, at the time.
we will add your name and address to the Tinite Mailing List. don't forget to sacrifice your vegetables!